I wrote this in a post from a few weeks ago:
The clincher is really that it’s not about checking “progress” on the change but rather, being in it alongside others.
And I wanted to get into what it could mean to be “in it alongside” rather than checking “progress” on the change.
I figured the most sensical way would be to make a comparison list.
So here goes:
Examples I use: securing a job, starting a new business, growing a garden
IN IT ALONGISDE:
“Have you experienced a ‘win’ lately in starting your new business? However small or large, I’d enjoy hearing.”
“Have you experienced a hurdle or roadblock lately with your job search? However small or large, I’d enjoy hearing.”
“If you’d like to rant, I’m here to listen” [and not attempt to offer advice since that’s not what a rant is about ;-) ].
“I’d love to share some greens from my garden. I recently learned something new about growing tomatoes! Want to hear?”
“How have you been feeling about your job search?”
Not asking anything related to jobs, business, or the new garden but instead simply laughing, chatting, or crying about something.
Doing something you both love together, virtually or in-person.
Knowing that change can be hard and taxing and offering to do something for the person moving through the change.
CHECKING “PROGRESS”:
“Have you gotten a job yet?”
“Have you harvested anything from your garden yet?”
“I have a friend who is a career coach / master gardener / business coach and they told me that what you need to do is….”
“Are you taking into account if the jobs you are applying to all offer benefits including retirement matching?”
“When will your new product be ready? I’ve been telling some friends about it and they really want to order it right now.”
It’s harder for me, in fact, to add examples to the checking “progress” list, which I guess I’m glad about! I’d much rather be in it alongside others as well as have others in it alongside me.
There is certainly a time and place for checking progress but more so on things that are “progress-able” like To Do Lists. And I don’t really see a job search, starting a new business, or tending to a new garden as being big long lists but rather experiences to move with.
If you have any examples you’d like to add to either list, leave a comment or reply to this emailed post. I’d love to hear.
Til tomorrow,
Cassandra